What I will not do

That’s easy and very basic. I will not do anything that will get me thrown into a third world jail. In Thailand a jail is called a monkey house for the obvious similarity of the surrounding iron bars. So remember no drugs, or sex with any minors of any gender, no falling down stupid drunkenness. I am only looking after you, not babysitting you. We are not traveling to the other half of the world to be engaging our time with, underpaid, non-respected, angry foreign police or militia. Most foreign police go out of their way to help American travelers who need assistance. However if you break their laws or disrespect their cultural ways, things can turn ugly and bad very fast. Let's have fun and stay out of trouble.